The funniest american history & 1776 jokes, ranked.

4 comedians, one topic. Quoted from the source, funniest first by our laugh score: surprise of the turn (40), economy (30) and specificity (30).

1. 1

   MS

   Quotations collected by Donald Gudehus, 1987 · on American history & 1776

   87

   “Washington couldn't tell a lie, Nixon couldn't tell the truth, and Reagan couldn't tell the difference.”

   Perfect three-part escalation across two centuries of presidents.

   Wikiquote: Mort Sahl ↗All American history & 1776 jokes →

2. 2

   

   What Am I Doing in New Jersey?, 1988 · on American history & 1776

   80

   “This country was founded by slave owners who wanted to be free. Am I right? A group of slave owners who wanted to be free!”

   Sums up the founding contradiction in one sentence.

   Wikiquote: George Carlin ↗All American history & 1776 jokes →

3. 3

   

   Dress to Kill, 1998 · on American history & 1776

   78

   On the Pilgrims landing in America.

   “They left from Plymouth and landed in Plymouth. How lucky is that? "Is this Plymouth? We've just come from Plymouth. "We've gone round in a circle, lads, back on the boats."”

   Takes a quirk of colonial place-naming literally and plays out the confusion.

   Scraps from the Loft: Eddie Izzard, Dress to Kill transcript ↗All American history & 1776 jokes →

4. 4

   

   tweet, 2012 · on American history & 1776

   72

   “Happy white peoples independence day the slaves weren't free but I'm sure they enjoyed fireworks”

   Holiday greeting undercut by a history lesson; the fireworks tag is very dry.

   Wikiquote: Chris Rock (citing ABC News) ↗All American history & 1776 jokes →