The funniest neighbors jokes, ranked.
4 comedians, one topic. Quoted from the source, funniest first by our laugh score: surprise of the turn (40), economy (30) and specificity (30).
- 1
88Anthony Jeselnik Bones and All, 2024 · on Neighbors
On his Los Angeles neighborhood getting dangerous.
“The other day, a woman in my neighborhood was walking her dog, had the dog stolen from her at gunpoint. Now it's my dog.”
Sounds like a neighborhood-watch story until the last four words confess to it.
Scraps from the Loft: Anthony Jeselnik, Bones and All transcript ↗All Neighbors jokes →
- 2
82Rodney Dangerfield It's Not Easy Bein' Me (book), 2004 · on Neighbors
“I tell ya, I grew up in a tough neighborhood. The other night a guy pulled a knife on me. I could see it wasn't a real professional job. There was butter on it.”
Butter is a precise, deflating detail.
Wikiquote: Rodney Dangerfield (p. 16) ↗All Neighbors jokes →
- 3
78Zach Galifianakis Live at the Purple Onion, 2007 · on Neighbors
“I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are so very mean.”
Misreads a traffic sign as an insult to the kids.
- 4
70Lewis Black Stark Raving Black, 2010 · on Neighbors
On the housing bubble everyone saw coming.
“You'd fucking go to a neighbor, "Gee, that house costed $60,000 last year, and now it costs $600,000?! What did they do?!" "Well, they put a gazebo in the back."”
The gazebo explains the housing bubble.